Expecting? Here’s five simple, but effective, ways to improve your mental health in pregnancy

Whilst pregnancy can be an incredible journey filled with excitement, anticipation, and a whirlwind of emotions, it can also come with its fair share of challenges. As a trained mental health therapist and hypnobirthing teacher, I have seen first hand the impact these challenges can have on expectant parents’ mental health.

So, get comfy, grab a cuppa (decaf, of course!), and let's explore five ways to help manage your mental health throughout your pregnancy, which hopefully you can take into the postpartum period too!

1. Using positive affirmations

Let’s talk about the power of positive affirmations. Now, I know they might sound a bit woo-woo, but trust me, they're like little nuggets of empowerment. A bit like listening to your favourite Beyonce song, whilst singing in the mirror, before a night out. They’re like your hype words and will boost your confidence and help to reduce any pesky worries.

So, take a moment and think about what makes you feel strong and capable. Is it the way your baby bump is growing? Or maybe it's the incredible journey your body is on? Try and create some personalised affirmations that resonate with you. Keep them handy, write them down, and say them out loud daily. When you're feeling a little overwhelmed, those affirmations will be like a big hug from yourself (or singalong in the mirror) reminding you just how incredible you are.

2. Practicing relaxation and self-care

Something every Mum-to-be (and person!) deserves – relaxation and self-care. Your body is working overtime, creating a whole new human being! Therefore it is essential to take time for yourself and embrace those moments of tranquility. Need some relaxation inspo? Say no more!

One of the simplest and probably most effective relaxation technique I teach, as both a therapist and hypnobirthing teacher, is deep breathing.

We all do it, bit when we feel overhwlemed or anxious, there is a method to it. And here it is:

1)  Breathe in slowly through your nose, counting to four. Feeling the breath filling your stomach and expanding

2)  Pause and hold the breath for two seconds

3)  Breathe out slowly through the mouth, counting to 7, whilst feeling the stomach emptying

4)  Repeat as many times as you feel comfortable doing

Why does this help? When we feel anxious our breathing changes and the fight or flight system is activated. We tend to breathe more quickly and shallow, triggering physical symptoms of stress and anxiety. Using the breathing technique above helps calm down the fight or flight response, allowing you to calm the physical symptoms and slow down your thoughts.

You can practice deep breathing anywhere – during your commute, before bed, or even while waiting for your prenatal check-up. It's like a mini vacation for your mind.

And self-care? Well, it's not a luxury; it's a necessity. So, draw a bubble bath, indulge in a good book, or savour some delicious, treats. Self-care looks different for everyone, so whatever gives you a sense of calm and happy, make sure to schedule it into your week. You deserve it!

3. Practicing Hypnobirthing Techniques

Alright, let's get into the juicy stuff, I couldn’t write a post about managing mental health in pregnancy and not mention hypnobirthing, could I?

Hypnobirthing might sound a bit hippy-dippy, but trust me, it's all backed by science and has an evidence-base behind it. I was shocked when I did my training, and seen just how similar it was to some of the CBT techniques I teach my therapy clients. I’m talking about techniques I’ve used with clients for over a decade and have seen working right in front of my eyes.

So what are they? Hypnobirthing uses a range of techniques which can help you feel relaxed, in control and focused during pregnancy, labour and birth. It is designed to help re-write any pre-existing beliefs about what birth is like. You know when you picture that horrific episode of One Born Every Minute and immediately go tense at the thought.. yeah we’re looking at reframing that response and replacing your beliefs about birth with more realistic and positive thoughts.

I can almost hear your skepticism: can merely thinking positively about birth change the outcome? Of course not, or else my thoughts would have made me a lottery winner by now. However, it does increase the likelihood of us taking steps towards a more positive birth experience, by using hypnobirthing techniques. For instance, if we genuinely believe in the possibility of a positive birth, why wouldn't we strive for it? On the other hand, if we anticipate a traumatic scenario like an episode from Call the Midwife, we might withdraw and reluctantly accept a challenging birth as inevitable.

As well as looking at practical techniques and re-writing fears, hypnobirthing also provides a full antenatal education. Meaning you go into birth knowing what to expect. From that first twinge, to what to do when it’s time to push. Meaning you can feel relaxed knowing what is going on and having a flexible birth plan in pace in case of any changes. Uncertainty breeds anxiety, so knowing what to expect eradicates this.

4. Connecting with other expectant parents

Pregnancy can feel lonely at times, especially if you’re the only one in your friend group or family who is pregnant. It can be hard not having someone to bounce off. I spent the majority of my pregnancy in local or nationwide lockdowns, so missed out on pregnancy classes or opportunities to meet up with people and I really felt that once I had my baby.

I’d read a lot about connecting with other Mum’s through apps like Peanut, or going along to local meet ups (when not in lockdowns) but for whatever reason I didn’t. I think I thought well I have friends already, that’s enough, right? But now I have Indigo and since going along to baby and toddler groups, I’ve made a group of Mum friends that I couldn’t be without now. Having someone to message and be like ‘is this normal?’ or just to offload to after a bad day really helps. It's having someone who gets your current situation. Sure friends who aren’t pregnant or don’t have children can do this, but there’s something special about having people who can 100% relate to where you are coming from and normalise what you are experiencing.

Plus it’s nice to have people you can speak to about what to buy, from prams to baby monitors etc. It doesn’t have to be about just supporting each other emotionally.

5. Communicating with Your Healthcare Team

Last but certainly not least, let's talk about your birth team. From the midwives, to the sonographers, you’ve probably seen a few health professionals throughout your pregnancy so far.

Hopefully, you will see the same midwife at your prenatal check ups, although this isn’t always the case. Even though it can feel easier to talk about how you’re feeling and ask questions to someone you’ve already built a relationship up with, it’s absolutely fine to ask a new midwife you haven’t seen before too. Healthcare professionals have heard it all, so you don’t need to worry about looking ‘silly’ or asking a daft question, as they will probably have heard it before and will definitely hear it again.

Your birth team are there to listen, support, and provide guidance tailored to your unique needs. But if you don’t ask the questions, they won’t know how to support you. When I look back on my pregnancy, I think I expected them to just ‘know’ what I needed, which is ridiculous. Midwives aren’t mind readers, so we need to share our concerns and worries in order for them to be able to offer the best care possible.

And remember, seeking specialised support when necessary is a sign of strength, not weakness. You're making sure you and your baby get the best care possible.

Well, there you have it. We've covered five ways to nurture your mental health during this incredible journey of pregnancy. Remember, you are strong, you are resilient, and you've got a whole community cheering you on.

So, as you embark on this adventure, don't forget to embrace positive affirmations, indulge in relaxation and self-care, explore the wonders of hypnobirthing, connect with a supportive community, and communicate openly with your healthcare team.

You've got this!

If you feel you need further support with your mental health during pregnancy or postpartum, please speak with your GP, midwife or health visitor. They will be able to refer you to a mental health professional who can support you. If you are pregnant or in the postpartum period, the referral in most cases would be prioritised.